At times throughout the journey of life, we are constantly experiencing positive or negative, up or down, and happy or sad. One of the Chinese proverbs stated that the experience of life is like being on a wheel that keeps turning, sometimes you are on top, and other times you are on the bottom.
Whilst experiencing life positively is much easier, many struggle to get through negative experiences, disappointment, pain, regrets, and challenges. Some people would even argue that there is nothing good or enjoyable about their life and most of their life’s experiences are filled with much more negative experiences than positive ones. I would argue that it’s not the truth.
From my own experiences and clients, I know that the main reason that we experience life negatively is due to past pain & experiences. We simply haven’t completed our healing journey. We allow the feelings to linger around and part of us is still living in that moment. We can’t let go of that part of our life journey, we keep holding on because deep down we regret and blame ourselves for allowing this experience to happen in our life.
However, life is about the journey, not the destination. We are here to enjoy the journey- both positive and negative. Without the negative, you cannot appreciate the positive! The most crucial part is not to wait for happiness upon arrival at your destination. We are here to learn life lessons, and negative experiences offer us those opportunities. They allow us the time to reflect, and then shift to the next level of mastery.
Healing takes time, that’s true, but most importantly it takes the courage to face our darker side and it takes even bigger more courage to claim our greatness. As Marianne Williamson quoted, “Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.” For this very same reason you might feel that your life is filled by more negative experiences than positive ones. We so easily forget our most joyful moments, but when it comes to negative experiences, not only do we keep remembering, we unintentionally reinforce the pain each time we recall it in our mind.
So what can we do to heal ourselves completely? The first step is ACCEPTANCE, accept that everything happens for a reason and reflect on what lesson you can take away from the negative. Identify the next level of life mastery that you can achieve from it. Next, forgive yourself, AND others. Remember that everyone is doing the best they can at that point in time. Forgiveness can be the most difficult part, as it might feel that you condone others’ actions, thoughts and behaviours. That is a misconception. Forgiveness is the most liberating exercise for you and your soul. It’s not about others, it’s only about you. Through forgiveness, you show that you love yourself and that you truly care about how you feel.
Emotional healing is part of life’s journey, and it is one of the most important steps to life mastery and success in life. It also releases the fear of not being good enough to be yourself and helps you to experience the positive flow of life while also enjoying the ups and downs.